Secrets We Keep
by curlygirl318
Summary: Hermione and Ron were very much married - one night with her best friend has an unintended consequence, one that will haunt their lives forever. What happens when Ron comes face to face with his wife and best friend's child? i"I would like to bring her home, Hermione." "Ron," she begins softly. "She's not…" she looks away, ashamed. "She can be." He cups her chin in his thumb a
1. Chapter 1

Ron's eyes scanned the window of the jewelry store in Muggle London. He'd been there before - plenty of times, actually. There was a jewelry store Hermione fancied. Their designs were different and for some reason caught her eye more than the goblin made pieces he'd find in Diagon Alley. It had to be perfect. They'd been through so much in the last few years. The tears and heartache were so fresh in his mind. The pavé rose pendant shone in the overhead lights – Ron knew this was exactly what he had been looking for. In a few months, their little Rose would arrive and hopefully, heal so much of the pain they'd been through.

With his hand on the buzzer to allow entrance to the store. That was when he noticed it. The signage on the shop was levitating. Ron smile to himself and looked around to find the source. Of course, there were other Wizards and Witches who frequented Muggle London but, he knew this magic was done by a child who had just discovered the things they could do.

Ron smiled thinking of the trouble he and his siblings had gotten into as children. Interest piqued, he looked around the square to see if he could place the little witch or wizard in training. His eyes fell on a little girl with a mop of dark curls and brilliant emerald eyes that were full of delight as she ran from the woman desperately trying to keep up with her.

"Maia," she called frantically.

Not looking back Ron watched as she made a beeline for the flowers, she'd set to change color.

Against his better judgement, he headed her off, his height and long gait made ten times the progress of her chubby little legs. He sat on the bench in front of the girl, not wanting to alarm her.

"Hullo there," Ron said as he corralled her in the small benched area. He swallowed hard when her lashes lifted and he was met with brilliant green eyes, the eyes of his best friend on a miniature version of his wife.

"Ron?" the familiar voice called from behind him, pulling him from his thoughts.

Ron gave his mother-in-law a crooked smile. "Hullo Thea," he greeted.

"Won!"

Ron jerked his head back to the little girl with the impish grin.

"Won!" she called again and used his long legs to help her climb the bench beside him. Her balance not quite perfect, Ron grabbed her before she could tumble backwards onto the concrete. It's an instinct he never knew he had.

She giggled and hugged his neck. "Won help My-my." She planted a kiss on his cheek and Ron's heart melted instantaneously. Before he knows it, chubby little arms are around his neck.

He'd been angry for so long he'd neglected to realize that there was someone else involved that was perhaps more innocent than any of them.

"Hug Won!" she demanded in a voice so much like her mother that Ron didn't know whether to laugh or to cry but, as he did when it came to Hermione, he obliged.

Thea Granger seemed to sense her son-in-law's internal turmoil and pried her granddaughter off him.

"I'm so sorry," she whispered gathering the little girl in her arms.

In an attempt to bring the attention away from the rambunctious girl in her arms, Thea asks "So, what brings you to this part of London?"

Ron's eyes never leave Maia. "I wanted to buy Hermione something for when the baby is born," he says absently.

"The baby?" Thea's brows are furrowed when Ron looks back up at her.

"Her-Hermione didn't tell you?" Ron frowned. _She seemed so excited_

Thea sits beside him, clutching her granddaughter tighter. "Hermione hasn't spoken to me since she dropped Maia at my door.

Ron pondered this a moment. "So, she's never-"

Thea shook her head. He tried his best to wrap his brain around the fact that his wife, the woman who had so desperately wanted children, hadn't laid eyes on her own in the last year and a half. And now, he'd had more interaction with her little girl than Hermione had ever had. For Merlin's sake, he'd even hugged the girl.

"How could she just leave her?" Ron asked. "And not tell you about the baby?"

Thea looked at her granddaughter sadly. "I wouldn't presume to know what my daughter is thinking. I've barely seen her since she was eleven anyway."

In that moment, Ron realized Thea was right, Hermione had spent most of the holidays with his family since their second year at Hogwarts. Then, there was the year she'd sent her parents to Australia.

"I haven't tried to keep her away," Ron sputtered running a hand through his hair.

"Dear," Thea sighed taking Ron's hand. "Does _anyone_ make Hermione do things she doesn't want to do?"

"Won!" Maia shrieked "Ook!" with that, the colors of the flowers in the closest planter began changing color. It was like she knew what she was doing, Ron mused. Instantly, he realized the danger of exposure.

"Uh-Maia, let's play a little game." The girl freed herself from her grandmother and managed to stand on Ron's legs. "Let's try to only play with the flowers at home," he suggested. "What do you say?" he poked her belly making her laugh in the process.

"No!" the colors became brighter and far more noticeable.

"What if I gave you ice cream?" he asked.

"I cream! I cream! I cream!" she chanted jumping on his lap

"Realy Ronald? Before lunch? Honestly," Thea sighed. Maia would be a sticky mess and wouldn't eat anything she tried to give her in terms of real food. She very quickly felt bad for scolding her son-in-law. "Alright," she said defeated.

"I was actually wondering if you would mind very much if I took her myself?"

Ron's face looked so very hopeful, especially when he added, "Y'know, I'm going to need some practice."

Thea laughed and gestured to the ice cream shoppe across the way. The truth was, she could use some time alone. She wasn't as young as when Hermione was a baby.

Forgetting about the gift for Hermione entirely, Ron grabbed the diaper bag and excited little girl and made his way to the shoppe.

How was it, he wondered, he could think so far as bringing her to Diagon Alley, sending her to Hogwarts, teaching her to ride a broom, all within having met her not half an hour before. Where did this feeling come from?

Ron took his wife's hand and led her toward their kitchen table where dinner was waiting. He'd left a little rose in a bud vase in front of her place setting as he'd done at nearly every meal they'd shared since reconciling.

His level of devotion overwhelmed Hermione. Here she was, the one who, in her own eyes, didn't even deserve forgiveness, and Ron was still fawning over her.

She lightly touched the velvety petals and looked up at her husband with a smile. She held his hand tighter. She wouldn't take his love for granted again. Ever.

"'Mione?" Ron brought her hand to his lips and then dropped it to his chest. "If I tell you something could you promise to maybe try and stay calm?" He felt her hand tense and knew immediately what she could be thinking. "It's nothing like that," he assured hurriedly.

Hermione stared at her husband pointedly. "Well?" her brows rose as she sipped the water at her place setting.

"I was in muggle London a couple of weeks ago."

"O-Ok…" Confused, she wordlessly urged him on.

"I ran into your Mum." He met her eyes to gauge her reaction, "and Maia."

Her breath hitches. "Ron," she tests her voice and looks at his feet.

"Maia was with her," he says softly. "I took her for ice cream." He adds with a half-smile.

Hermione's head shoots up and her eyes search his. "I think your mum was a tad put out because it was before lunch." It was if she had forgotten to breathe. Ron had taken her daughter for ice cream. The child she hadn't seen since she was days old.

"I would like to bring her home, Hermione."

"Ron," she begins softly. "She's not…" she looks away, ashamed.

"She can be." He cups her chin in his thumb and forefinger and brings her gaze to meet his.

"How would this even work Ronald? How could we bring her here?" her throat is tight, but she continues. "Your Mum and Dad would hate her for starters. Then there's Ginny. She's barely speaking to me as it is.

"I'll tell her it's my idea." He sits in the seat beside Hermione. "It _is_ my idea."

"No, she's better off with my Mum. _We're _all better off that she's with my Mum."

"No, _we're _not." He says shaking his head. "We're doing her a disservice not raising her."

"Really Ron," Hermione sighed and rolled her eyes

"She's showing abilities already." With this, Hermione seemed intrigued, Ron continued. "Your mum said when you were a child, you were like her though she didn't put it together until you were older and your abilities didn't begin quite so young."

Hermione let out a breath. He's speaking of her daughter with something akin to pride. "If we talk to the family – get their buy-in?" he asks.

Her eyes are wet. When did she start crying?

"We talk to Harry and Gin first." Her voice is barely audible as he gathered her in his arms and kissed her soundly.

"I don't think this will be a problem."

Hermione rests her head on her husband's chest. "You've clearly not spoken to your sister recently," she muttered.

Hermione and Harry had barely been near one another since before Maia's birth. They'd spent functions at the Burrow as far away from one another as possible. To say being at the same table together was uncomfortable was an understatement.

Not that the Burrow had been neutral territory, it most certainly wasn't but, it was a far sight better than Harry and Ginny's home.

Since the affair – _could you deem a one night stand an affair? Maybe when a child was involved,_ she mused. Hermione had received quite the cold shoulder from Molly. Not that she'd expected the woman to welcome her back with open arms but, she'd hoped for at least the same treatment Harry had received. Silent treatment for a few weeks, followed by annoyed glances, a talking to, the likes he'd never seen before, even when doing something incredibly dangerous like bringing her youngest son along on a horcrux hunt. It had taken some time, but she'd returned to being his surrogate mother.

Was it that she, Hermione, should have known better? Her mother-in-law surely didn't know the desperation and heartbreak of trying for years to have a baby only to be met month after month with failure. She didn't know the way it ate at your soul until you were just a husk of a person. She didn't know the way it felt to let your husband, your partner in everything down month after month as you were sure he was tired of reassuring you when you couldn't reassure yourself that one day you would in fact have a child.

She didn't know that the hormones you would ingest and shoot into your body just to have a fraction of the number of children she'd borne would give you hot flashes, mood swings, bouts of rage and frustration. She didn't know the oceans of tears that had fallen from your eyes. Until one day when you watched your husband with his new nephew, your best friends son and while he doesn't know you're there, you hear him speak to the baby and wonder if he will ever get to hold someone so new that's his. Wonder if he will ever wake up in the middle of the night to change diapers or warm bottles. To hear his innermost doubts about their future.

And that's when you finally crumble inside. That's when you pack just enough clothes and items to get by. Your husband is too good of a man to leave you. You feel completely broken inside. _These are things a woman should be able to do and do easily, are they not? _ and find a flat near the ministry. Your job is the only thing you have anyway.

After not taking any visitors for months, your best friend shows at your door with a bottle of firewhiskey. It's an expensive bottle. He's got the galleons. His son hasn't slept through the night in the last two months and he's losing his mind. When you've had half a bottle of very expensive firewhiskey, your mind does very stupid things. It reaches for comfort first of all – especially when you've devoid yourself of human contact for the better part of two months. She doesn't know who reaches out to the other first, but she does remember tracing his scar with her index finger. Very gently.

"It doesn't hurt anymore," he says stupidly, green eyes never leaving hers. "It used to burn when he was trying to get into my mind. It sounds crazy but, it was lonely at first – after that connection was broken."

She knows all about lonely and broken connections. His eyes settle on her mouth and then back up to her eyes. Perhaps this is what Ron was afraid of when they were searching for Horcruxes. Perhaps this is what she should have been afraid of when she let Harry in earlier in the evening. Perhaps firewhiskey and an empty stomach don't mix. His body moves over hers and before she her brain can catch up to what's happening, their clothes are gone from their bodies and in a heap on the floor.

She knows she's awake first because the sunlight streams into her eyes and Harry is beside her on the floor with nothing on but his glasses which are askew on his nose. She throws a pillow at him to cover up and he awakens with a start. Black hair standing on end, he tries to focus and realigns his glasses as she clutches a hand to her head. They both realize very quickly that she is naked as well. She grabs the blanket from the other side of the sofa and covers her bare body.

_What had they done?_

_Author's Note: This story has been ruminating in my head for the longest time - probably a decade. I finally sat down to write it and can only hope that I do it justice._


	2. Chapter 2

"You want her to live where?" Ginny's voice was eerily quiet. Ron could feel the anger seeping from his sister's pores.

"First of all," he managed with as much patience as he could muster. "Let's address the child by her name." He knew this was not easy for Ginny either. "Her name is Maia. Perhaps we call her that instead of her or the girl or whatever else we've been referring to her as."

"The Mistake?"

Ron's head whipped up and his eyes met his sisters with an anger she'd so rarely seen from him. "Enough!" He'd silenced his sister quickly. In fact, none had ever seen Ron silence his sister before.

"Now I'm not asking you Gin. I'm telling you. Maia is coming to live with us. We will raise her." Ron grabbed Hermione's hand and met Harry's gaze. "As ours," he said as if daring his best friend to challenge him.

"What would be to Maia then," Harry pondered with an attempt to seem apathetic and follow along with Ron.

"Her Godparents."

Ginny arched a perfect red brow. Ignoring her husband's question or her brother's reply she continued, "She's probably very happy where she is Ronald."

"Maia," he replied calmly, "is a very happy girl." He raked a hand through his hair in frustration, "But she's showing very strong abilities. Ones that cannot be denied and ones that will draw attention from the muggle world and the ministry."

"How so?" Harry's head perked up. He tried to use caution when showing interest for his biological daughter in front of his wife, but Ron had him intrigued.

"Harry, it was incredible - Maia is incredible." Ron tightened his grip on Hermione's hand. "She changed all the colors of the flowers in the courtyard and she's not even two. Her control is amazing." He paused to take a breath and swallowed hard.

The girl, Maia, his daughter, was essentially an orphan. An orphan whose parents were very much alive but lived with enormous amounts of guilt. Was he ok with only knowing his daughter as her Godfather as Ron suggested? Could he spend every day pretending she was someone who wasn't even related to by blood? He'd felt so alone at the Dursley's. Would Maia be made to feel that way with Ron and Hermione? No – it didn't seem that way. For starters, Hermione was her mother and Ron was pushing for this. Ron was the one in awe of his and Hermione's daughter.

"There's another reason – one I only thought of once I'd spoken to Hermione of having Maia come live with us."

"What's that?" Harry pushed a hand into his hair.

"If anyone found out who she is – Who she truly is," Ron's blue eyes were hard but not unkind as they bore into Harry's. "She'd be in a lot of danger."

"I'm not sure that she'd be in any more danger than James or the new baby," Ginny sighed.

"Harry Potter's daughter being raised by a muggle? Not only that, Hermione's mother? Don't you think that would be a former Death Eater's dream?"

Harry rubbed his scar out of habit. Ron was right. Harry Potter and Hermione Granger's daughter would have a bigger target on her back than James or the new baby even.

Had they orphaned their daughter in some vain attempt to return to some semblance of a normal life? A life that would never be the same.

They both lived with enormous amounts of guilt. Could either of them every raise their daughter properly?

Was he truly ok with knowing Maia only as her Uncle, her Godfather?

Could he spend his days pretending he wasn't related by blood to the child? His child.

He'd spent his childhood feeling alone and unwanted at the Dursleys. Would Maia be made to feel that way with Ron and Hermione?

No – it didn't seem that way. Ron was the one pushing for this. Then again, Hermione… she was the wild card in this equation and Maia was her own daughter.

Questions bounced around Harry's mind as Ron continued his pitch as to why they should be raising Maia.

Ron was in awe of his daughter.

The Potters had collected James from Molly and Arthur's and returned home. Harry tried to think of ways to approach the topic of Maia with Ginny again but, she beat him to it.

"Of all of the stupid thoughts Ronald has had in his life," she said maneuvering throw pillows from their bed, "and believe me there have been loads." Harry snorted he had been friends with Ron since he was eleven. She didn't need to explain Ron's bad ideas to him. "This one takes the fricken cake," she huffed fluffing her pillow between each word as if to emphasize them.

"Would it really be so terrible Gin?" Harry's voice is quiet as thoughts of his daughter's soft curls flutter through his mind.

"Harry!" Thea Granger doesn't attempt to mask her surprise as she pulls the heavy oak door open. "What brings you here?"

Harry pushes his glasses up the bridge of his nose and takes in her disheveled appearance; hair astray, random spit-up stains on her blouse, dark circles beneath her eyes.

He holds up a box of nappies. "Thought you could use some. I know how quickly they go through them."

Thea smiles and ushers in the young man who very nearly died to protect non-magical people like herself. Muggles as Hermione calls them.

"Fancy a cuppa?" She asks closing the door behind him.

Harry nods and follows Thea through the cottage to the kitchen surveying the various baby apparatuses as they go. It looks very much like his own home as muggle baby items are very helpful in day to day life – especially as James is beginning to pull himself up to a standing position. But Maia…

"I er-wasn't sure what size."

"Those are right, she's still fairly tiny." Thea sets the kettle and glances at him. "But very healthy," she adds seeing his concern.

Harry nods and drops into a chair at the kitchen table. The room is decorated in soft pinks and windows line the back wall allowing sunlight to brighten the room. Before he can speak or the water can boil, he hears a squawking from a nearby monitor.

"Right on time," Thea says looking at her watch.

In her absence, the water begins to boil. Harry mutely searches for cups and tea, kept in much the same places he imagined Hermione would keep them, and silently prepares their tea. He helps himself to a third sugar cube and is raising his cup to his lips when Thea and Maia appear in front of him in the kitchen.

He freezes. "We both know why you were on my doorstep Harry."

He places his cup on the counter and before he can protest, Thea lays his daughter in his arms with a swiftness he imagines could rival Molly Weasley. The weight of the small bundle in his arms causes his breath to catch.

James had been a bruiser from the moment he was born, weighing in at just under nine pounds. Maia was tiny and delicate and at two months old, still smaller than James at birth.

Thea wordlessly hands him a bottle. "Take her into the sitting room. Easier to feed her on the sofa"

From his spot at the end of the sofa he can see various pictures of Hermione at different ages scattered around the room and littering the walls. Beside her pictures are those of Mr. Granger. The non-moving pictures were numerous and made Harry's heart sink. Mr. Granger hadn't been gone very long, a little over a year. Harry knew how terribly Hermione had taken her father's passing. How terribly she'd dealt with it. The bundle moved gently, drawing his attention back to her.

Hermione – Harry wondered how often she came to visit their daughter. He almost asked but his own brilliant green eyes stared back up at him from inside the blankets. The view took him by surprise. Hermione had never mentioned Maia looking like him. Then again, in the past ten months or so, they had barely spoken, and neither Harry nor Ron had been with Hermione when Maia was born.

"I'd say she's a fair mix of the both of you." Thea had given him a few minutes before joining on a neighboring high-backed chair. She studied him briefly. "I'm not sure on her temperament yet though," Thea added with a smile. "You've both got a penchant for danger so I'm afraid we're both up the duff there." Thea caught herself and placed a hand over her mouth. "Forgive the lapse in judgement and poor phrasing. She doesn't sleep very much or very well and I'm not as young as I was the first time around."

Harry looked at Thea, she appeared older than the last time he had seen her just after Mr. Granger had passed, and much more tired.

"Bit harder to do alone." She forces a smile. He wonders if she's truly a witch with the way she reads his mind.

Perhaps they hadn't fully realized the burden they'd placed on Thea. So newly widowed and raising her only daughter's child – a child who did not belong to her son-in-law. With her daughter's marriage in trouble and a baby who needed family, what else could she do?

"I asked to take her Harry." Thea replied to his thoughts again. "Would Ginny have let you parent her with Hermione or raise her as her own?"

Harry takes in his daughter's face, swallows thickly, and shakes his head.

"No," he says softly. "I don't know if Ron would be too thrilled with those options either."

Thea thinks for a moment and sips her tea. "Maybe the second option – I think he would warm to it more than Ginny. He's a bit hot-headed at first but eventually cools." She raises her cup again, "at least that's what I've experienced."

Harry thinks for a moment. Ron does usually come around, sometimes needing a push.

"I'd like to visit more often, if you'll allow it. You can call me her uncle if it would make it easier," Harry adds though the thought of being Maia's uncle tears at his heart.

"Harry, you can visit whenever you like."

He had for a while until the visits caused a pronounced change in schedule. He didn't want to stir Ginny's suspicions when she was just beginning to trust him again.

Having grown up without his own parents, the thought of not seeing Maia grow up tore at his heart.

Maia being raised by Ron and Hermione with him and Ginny as her Godparents was essentially what he had proposed to Thea.

The sound of James' cry roused him from his thoughts. He was out of bed before Ginny could stir. This pregnancy had been harder on her than the last, she was more tired in general but that could have something to do with a bustling two-year-old.

He loved Ginny and their family more than anything in the world. After living in a cupboard under the stairs, being tormented daily and virtually neglected emotionally throughout his adolescence, he was terrified of risking the family he had built. Maia was cared for, he reasoned with himself. Thea loved and adored his daughter. It was a different situation than what he lived in at the Dursleys.

Then why did he feel a sense of dread similar to the feeling he would get before returning to number 4 Privet Drive at the beginning of each summer.

"What's wrong mate?" Harry smoothed the shock of black hair on his son's head which promptly feathered back up.

"Missed Da." James nuzzled his head into Harry's neck.

Harry kissed his son's head. "Da's not going anywhere. I'm just across the hall," he said with some guilt as he rocked the boy back to sleep.

Harry slipped back into bed and curled himself around his wife.

"James go back down easy?" She whispered into the darkness.

He pulled her closer. "Easy enough," he replied kissing her neck. "For James anyway," he added smiling into her flaming hair.

Ginny gave a soft laugh. "Your son, that one."

"He's a good boy," Harry added as he pressed a hand to where the newest Potter was doing somersaults.

"That he is."

Harry had fallen into a light sleep when he heard her speak again.

"Harry?"

"Yes Luv?" he mumbled sleepily.

"I don't want you to resent me forever for this," she said into the darkness.

"Resent you?" he flicked the lights on with his wand and reached for his glasses. "Gin, never in a million years."

"What if you never have another daughter except," Ginny swallowed hard before speaking her name. "Except Maia."

"Then I have my wife and my boys." His stomach churned.

"She'll go to Hogwarts."

Harry hadn't thought of that. Maia and James would be in the same year.

"What if she and James become friends?" she worried her bottom lip between her teeth.

"It's nine years away," he spoke with a sigh.

Ginny paused a beat and they sat in silence before she pushed herself up to sit beside him. He wrapped an arm around her, and she rested her head on his shoulder.

"When was the last time you saw her?" she asked quietly.

Harry stiffened.

"I knew that's where you'd been. You wouldn't risk your family again."

He nodded and sighed. She was right, he wouldn't.

"She-she had just started talking." His voice was a whisper in the dimly lit room. Ginny grew still beside him. "She said Da. She'd called me Da." And if she went to live with Ron and Hermione, she'd call Ron Da."

"Did you and Hermione ever go visit together."

Loaded question, he thought. It was more of a question of how much time he had spent with Hermione.

"As far as I know Hermione hasn't seen Maia since the day she was born. Or Mrs. Granger for that matter."

Ginny frowned and looked at him questioningly.

"Thea-Mrs. Granger, made a point of telling me that she hadn't."

"Seriously?" That didn't sound like the sister-in-law she remembered.

"She said Hermione had suffered from some sort of depression during her pregnancy and pretty bad post-partum depression after Maia was born." He paused before adding, "It was pretty severe, Gin."

"It's called guilt," she said without sympathy.

Harry recoiled a bit. He knew what guilt felt like. Guilt didn't cause suffering the way Hermione had.

"It started before Maia," he said carefully. "Ron brought her to a muggle hospital after she was born though."

"Why a muggle hospital?" she asked despite herself.

"Hermione Granger Weasley in St. Mungo's – The press would have had a field day."

"Did," she began and started again. "Why did Ron tell you?"

"No one else to tell I suppose." Harry wrapped a fiery strand of her hair around his finger and uncoiled it again. "Thea has Maia. Your Mum hasn't really spoken to her – neither have you and I'm not saying you should," he added quickly. "Ron needed someone to talk to and I don't think he was any happier that it was me than you are."

"Mmhmm." Was the only reply he received.

"Maybe you should spend some time with your brother," he suggested. "He may understand how you're feeling."

"I could gouge my eyes out with a spoon too."

Harry shook his head when she added, "I do doubt he would agree with my assessment that the Cruciatus didn't do it'"

He cringed inwardly. It was something his wife would never understand. He knew she was still hurting but thought of Hermione's screams at Malfoy Manor made him flinch.

"What if we go visit Maia at Mrs. Grangers?" he proposed after a beat. "I want you to be comfortable with your decision in the long run."

Ginny sighed. "Can I think about it?"

"Take as much time as you need."

Notes:

Perhaps a little more insight into the characters who are heavily flawed but hopefully redeemable.


End file.
